This is Levar Chase, the ONLY blogger of the SuckaFree Franchise, and I’m bringing users the latest on FAs, Draft and beefs. *shhhh, somebody gotta snitch right* The season has predictably slowed down due to off-season movements, signings and users’ schedules. The overall feeling throughout the league is that only bout HALF of the users are really, REALY “active”. I don’t wanna call nobody out but basically the tier 1’s of Pickens, Rocket, Hawk plus the only true ‘threat’ of Commish Funky, Co-Commish Bowman, trash talk tyrant Ant Joh and MuthaFugga King of the the Titans. (He has that weird ass, can only play AM vs. users schedule). We don’t expect much from the other users anymore. IF dudes gon hit that ‘ready to advance’ button, no problem but I get it. Life get busy and pressing a button on the PS4 just ain’t the priority in folks’ life. It don’t hurt when you’re losing OR start feeling like you can’t win anyway, then you NEVER have time! #ROTFLMAO As the best and ONLY blogger of SuckaFree news, I’m telling ya, set your draft board in case something happens and you can’t draft. It is crucial for some, but not others. *shrugs*
2029 SuckaFree Free Agency…
The biggest catch in FA was WR Jason Stinson, former Dallas Cowboy. The deep threat WR was never the fastest but he natural ability to find open zones, make contested catches and break on the corner made him a household name in the D. User teams felt the WR was losing steps over the last few years in Dallas but CPU Vikings took a chance and signed the vet. The same with possible HOF LT David Asher, former Funky/Bills guy, who signed with the CPU Colts in their effort to save themselves from the onslaught of the Titans pass rush.
Studs and Dude Miiiiight just POP up this year.
Enrique Mays, 6’2, 26yr, hybrid CB/Safety -> MuthaFugga (Titans)
Enrique Mays was the apple of the Titans eye this offseason. Coach MuthaFugga explained that the secondary could be strength if the team could stop alternating so much between speedy Carney and Bradley. “As a duo, they were excellent but Enrique brings something else. The ability to play safety, slot and big cover LB. I have biiiig plans for the guy.
Kendrick Houston, 6’2, man CB, 25yrs
The Jets continue their efforts to build a winner by focusing the edges of the offense and defense. First, their trade of OLB () for WR Irv Smith with user Bowman/49ers. The move was widely viewed as an even trade but fans wondered who would fill the void. Well, the Jets signed star man CB Kendrick Houston to shore up the secondary. Coach Ant Joh believes the edges of user games determine winners and his philosophy will be tested as his trash talk makes him a target for damn near everybody!
Carey Decker, pass LT, 26yr -> MuthaFugga (Titans)
Decker’s addition is a head-scratcher around the league. TN regularly employs heavy T formations and flexes run blocking TEs to abuse running lanes. Will Stonewall move the RT or G positions to make Decker a possibility in TN. The Titans play true smashmouth, downhill, power football and do not chase speed players but this recent addition to strengthen a strength is questionable at best.
Wayne Moore,6’1, deep WR, 26yrs -> Hawkeye (Cowboys)
The Cowboys look to replace Superstar WR Jason Stinson with younger bodies. Wayne Moore is hoping for an opportunity to prove him and make the jump with a system that likes to go deep, take big shots and bring shootouts.
Jarvis Avant, 6’1, deep WR, 26yr -> Eagles
Rocket’s Eagles have enjoyed their first full season the SuckaFree leading rush team. Their system don’t seem to NEED WRs and the team signed Jarvis in a cost cutting move. The majority of calls are for Tyrell Armstrong and Avant will never see double coverage.
Craig Boston, 5’11, zone CB, 27yr, -> MuthaFugga (Titans)
The Titans continued their remixing the team secondary with the addition of Boston. The veteran is expected to play boundary roles and spell Mooney and Lincoln.
Veterans making their last stand?
Alvin Kamara, receiving RB, 34yr -> 48Bars (Steelers)
48Bars is making the most questionable move of the users with this signing. Although Kamara has something left in the tank, he will not be expected to relive his Saints days as Pittsburgh feeds DeMerrius Clinkscale consistently. The youngster took Pittsburgh to the AFC championship last year.
Shaq Phillips, pass G, 32yrs -> Chiefs ()
Clock’s Chiefs shored up their Oline with the stable veteran Phillips. The Chiefs won their division last but Joey Hicks of BBall’s Raiders has given them issues. Phillips veteran presence should solidify the lineplay.
Marshawn Lattimore, 6’0, man CB, 33yrs
The veteran CB has enjoyed himself as a standout CB his entire career. “I just wanted a chance to win championships. Playing safety, slot, blitzing as a LB… I’m ready.”
Dak Prescott, improviser QB, 36yrs
Big Prin’s Rams signed the veteran to bring Phillip Harden competition in the QB room and on the field. Said the coach, “Harden has to step up. He is a Superstar but doesn’t play consistently at all. Dak is here is help push him OR take over.”
2029 SuckaFree PRE-Draft News!
As the draft approaches, users are fiending for something to occupy their time as they plan and plot their boards. Well, I present SuckaFree Draft Stories!
Offensive Playmakers
The users looking QB starters ared disappointed in this year’s QB class. Led by ASU’s Starr and Mississippi State’s Dunlap, neither QB had a great final season college. The WR group was lackluster as well. Paul Smith (Oregon State) and Damion Whitfield (Pittsburgh) traded positions all year as the nation’s best RB. Larry Winston and Miami struggled down the stretch and the RB lost ranking as his inability to pass block was exposed.
Paul Smith is the complete back of the two. His ability to block, inside, outside, catch was prevalent all season AND he only 21.
Damion Whitfield shattered Shady McCoy’s records at Pittsburgh. The RB was the focal point of an old school approach that didn’t highlight his ability to catch the ball.
Defensive Playmakers
This year’s draft was more defensive to most coaches surveyed.
Irvin Vick won the Heisman this year. The playmaking safety arrived at South Carolina with Allen Trent and all the two did was lead the university to it’s first College Football Playoff Championship. The defense was something special and Vick was heart/soul/leader. The senior played all over the secondary and even rushed the passer to shock FSU in the ACC championship. That led to his nation leading 9th FF and the senior returned the fumble-6 himself for the game’s only TD. South Caroline defeated Florida State 9-0 as Vick added a TFL of the RB and safety.
Taj Wade, Kansas CB, was impressive his lone season starting in the SEC. Highlighted early in the season after a shocking 4 turnover games vs. Clemson, the senior rode the wave to the nation’s top CB award.
Big Boyz Upfront on da O-line
Lane Johnson is well known. First, his father is Lane Johnson, former Eagles RT. Second, the junior won the nation’s top OL award as UCLA earned their first Rose Bowl appearance behind his stellar play.
D-line Hunters and Stoppers
South Carolina is not JaDavveon Clowney but the senior was dominant his whole career. Trent broke the school record for career sacks, TFL and never missed a game his 4-year run.
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