SuckaFree 2029, Week 1 Update

Yoooo! The shit popped off with Ant Joh and Pickens steady swag banging on each other over losses in a separate franchise. Apparantly Ant Joh was smashed 41-0 in the OTHER franchise and… Well, it was on from there. The two went back and forth in that playing-around-but-slanging-slugs style that is customary of shit talking. Mustang, missing in action for weeks, showed up to defend himself after a “miscommunication” with Kaso. The cake may have been Rocket’s declaration of being Tier 1. The user did not agree that Tier 1’s have a championship and felt he belonged. In his eyes, he was “recruited” by Commish Funky just for BIG games and hired to knock Pickens into reality. To make a long story short, Rocket did everything EXCEPT beat Pickens, losing 17-10 in the NFC championship. His only two losses were to Hawk (Tier 1) and Rocket (Tier 1). Coaches around SuckaFree took note that his demand for improved status coincided with a loss to BrigPrin’s Rams in a preseason shocker week 3.

What up on dem USER games tho homie?

Funky’s Buffalo Bills vs. Pickens’ ATL Falcons

The HOT user vs. user game was Funky taking his Bills down to the ATL in a highlight matchup vs. the 3x consecutive champion Hawks. The final score was ugly AF and led to the whole beef between Pickens and Ant John. In his defense, Funky stated that the game was freezing, stalling, etc. “Potna, I only called dive plays on offense because I couldn’t MOVE players around.” Pickens is a certified beast but money on Funky’s technical issues. Waaaaaay too many times in Madden history, a user experiences issues and it causes restarts, delays in franchise plays and general nonsense.

Mustang’s Detroit Lions vs. Kaso’s Cleveland Browns

There were some communication issues and Mustang beat the CPU Brown 37-24.

MuthaFugga’s TN Titans vs. 48Bars’ Pittsburgh Steelers

MuthaFugga’s Titans were handled rough by 48Bars and his Steelers. The Titans refused to trust the passing game and leaned on simple runs to hold clock and keep 48Bars off the field. Why? What could make the Titans so fearful?

Garret Philpot-Grimes’s efficiency! The first year starter watched as Mariotta, rejuvenated and reincarnated, took the Steelers to the AFC Championship. Coming into the season, Pittsburgh felt comfortable with he and Marcus handling the QB position. The Steelers looked into FA but with cap penalties on expiring veterans, they held tight and pushed forward.

The Titans gave multiple RBs opportunities vs. the Steelers and all responded with nice averages but only because each had one good run. The rookie, Denard Booth of West Georgia, was the draft’s fastest RB with a 4.39 40. His straight speed showed on a 70 TD run in which the Napolean Kaufman wannabe took a stretch, cut hard against the RG’s power block and went untouched. “Yeah. That run was big and earned the rook a few extra carries next week. We’ll see. I obviously was NOT impressed with the offense or defense.”

Division Standings

AFC East

AFC West

AFC South

AFC North

NFC South

NFC North

NFC East

NFC West

AND ya boi got the gooooood draft juice too! πŸ€œπŸΎπŸ€›πŸΎ

Nash Porter enters his final season with the hopes of Vanderbilt on his back. The senior QB can leave as the Commodores all time leader in passing yards, passing TDs, wins but has not captured a division crown in the SEC. His mother played K for Eastern Kentucky and broke barriers. Her lone season ended 15 of 18, long of 53yards. “I’m proud of my mom. She’s somewhere in the stands now, craft beer and tight-eyed. She’s everything to me and the reason I play football, listen to everything screwed and chopped and came to Vandy.

Carlos Greer was the first to accept the new NFL ruling that prospects could return to college after the combine. The ruling came as part of larger lawsuit that allows student-athlete to earn monies for their likeness in video games and TV revenue. Greer was projected to be a mid round pick, 3rd, but a 22″ vertical and 4.82 40 ended any hopes of a selection. He returns to to UT State to prove himself and improve his stock.

Final thoughts…

It is a bunch of user games this season. That is double edged sword as guys play each other more but humans’ schedule are…. usually different. User Hawk has stepped away for a time to handle personal matters. Users wondered why MuthaFugga of the Titans asked 48Bars to “Please, end the game bro. Not the scoring now.” *raises hand* Well, I’m THAT MuthaFugga and I fell trying to use RR during game. I was hurting bad, left a mess, didn’t want the kids to see so I asked. *shrugs* Shit happens and piss is downhill. Preciate that 48Bars! #SaluteMyAssOff

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